School Meetings

“Effective liaison between the key partners minimises disruption caused by illness to a pupil’s education. It is essential that there is good liaison between the school, parents, hospital and home teaching service” - Access to Education Guidelines paragraph 4.1.

All parents or guardians of young people with ME/CFS need to have meetings with schools at some time.  These may be with a teacher or a panel of professionals representing the school, Local Education Authority (LEA), the medical authorities and, perhaps, other agencies.  Sometimes parents feel these meetings slip out of their control and feel alienated in the decision-making.  Here are some tips to help parents feel more confident about the process:

BEFORE THE MEETING

Keep all letters and documents in a ring binder in date order.  Letters are proof of what has been agreed.  If phone calls are necessary, follow up with a letter or, at least, keep a log of the phone call.
Have a clear idea of what you want to say or ask for at the meeting.  Collect information from AYME so you know where you stand.  Agree your plan of action with your child.  Make notes to use as a crib sheet.  Decide what you are prepared to compromise on and to what degree.
Ask your partner or a friend to come with you for support.  Discuss with them, in detail, the points you want to make and how you will divide this between you.
Make copies of relevant documents you wish to hand round at the meeting. Choose documents that support the points you want to make.  These may be hospital reports, health diary, letter from your child as well as documents listed below.
Take pen and paper to take notes.  It can be difficult talking, listening and note-taking at the same time, so agree with your partner or friend who will be note-taker.  With permission of the meeting, it may be possible to use a tape recorder.

DURING THE MEETING

Keep calm. We all get nervous at times like this and being informed and well-prepared will make you more confident. Remember, you are the expert here!
Ask everyone to introduce themselves. You may not have met them before.
Assume no-one knows anything about your child or ME/CFS. This is the safest starting point (unless this is a follow-up meeting) but be brief.
Be concise. You need to keep your audience alert.
Ask questions about anything you don’t understand.  Professionals often use jargon that may make parents feel alienated.
Keep an eye on the time. Don’t let the meeting finish before you have covered the points you want to make.  If this happens ask for another meeting.
Professionals sometimes suggest unreasonable targets.  Suggest you use these targets at a later date when your child’s health has improved.
Don’t lose your temper.  If the meeting is going wrong, give reasoned counter-arguments and stick to your plan. Save your frustration for later.
Finish the meeting with a summary.  This is a verbal agreement of what has been decided and what is to happen next.

AFTER THE MEETING

Write up your notes as soon as you get home.  Send a copy to the professionals at the meeting and ask them to confirm the content.  Tell them that if you don’t hear from them in two weeks you will assume they agree with the notes.
At larger meetings, minutes will be taken.  Ask for a copy and check them for accuracy against your own notes.  If you disagree with the content, challenge the minutes with a letter containing your own understanding of the meeting.

Treat yourself to something special – you deserve it!

USEFUL DOCUMENTS

• Access to Education for Children and Young People with Medical Needs DCSF 0732/2001 Telephone 0870 000 2288 or http://publications.teachernet.gov.uk/default.aspx?PageFunction=productdetails&PageMode=publications&ProductId=DFES+0732%2f2001&%E2%80%9D
• LEA policy document on the education of sick children available from your local County Hall
• Code of Practice for Schools Disability Discrimination Act 1995: Part 4 Telephone 08457 622633 or www.drc-gb.org

Article last edited on Wednesday 29th July 2009                          Printable Version